So lately I've been dealing with what I think is the "Student Frustration Syndrome" ...
I have NO money to pay bills, NO time for a job, NO clothes and almost no food...
which mixes up to the fact that I have had NO motivation what so ever to go jogging for like almost a month now and the final stage of my animation "Sprinkle me Silly"...
I look and gaze at those people who have gone through this same process and have made it somewhere, but where's my place in all this hey... I know I gotta keep pushing, but at times if feel unreachable.
My dad just arrived back from Chile and speaking to him has helped me understand a few things about me and also re-plan my future as to where I want to go with my career...
At some point I would like to have a studio as big as WETA studios where we provide full preproduction , production and post production. Provide props, concept art, special effects, 3d animation, motion capture, miniatures, costumes, etc...
But before I can do this I need to gain experience and but together some useful knowledge, and for that I need a job at a studio....something!! I have been probably these 3 years asking for an opportunity, but nothing...so what can I do??
After I finish the animation, Im going straight back to paper and flesh out the new script for The Blackberry Monster, put together a team of people interested on working on it (national or international) and make the film, I will also prepare everything to send my animation to festivals (as soon as I gather some money).
And while I do this I will be writting SIN, finally! and register it with the America Writer Guild West...and see how that goes...
Someday I'll have a franchise, seems impossible now but not for the future me I can guarantee it.
At the moment my freelancing is picking up. Slowly but there's something...recently got a job worth quite a bit of money and vey happy I got it but still waiting. I have learned not to be overwhelmed with joy when I get a job, and look at it with skepticism. I have been promised so much stuff that by now I twitch my eye to an opportunity until it becomes real...
Ok so now that I have spewed out all of my worried and frustrations I have nothing else to say...only push and wait...
We went for a long walk to Box Hill with my girlfriend and on our way back we began thinking that nature itself has its own pace... there's a reason why it is so perfect, it's because it takes its time!
This comes in with some of the things that have been happening to me lately, I've come to realize that everything comes in time, if you work for it of course.
Ever since I started studying Animation I have continuously been hearing and overhearing conversation from my peers and teachers on how hard this industry really is and that it is so shit and so dark, bla bla.... Well like everything in life you have to work for it.
Here why I come to this week; I have been trying to meet people from the industry or from other art backgrounds to nurture myself from their knowledge but I have found that not many are as motivated to do the same... I have this crazy idea where one day I could bring together artists from different backgrounds, network and help each other out, but it's a hard thing to do when people arent self motivated...This idea I have had it for the past 2 years or so and started to do it some time ago, I sent out an ad on gumtree.com and posted up a meeting date, created a blog, etc etc, people got excited!, but when the day arrived only 1 showed up! very disapointing and also was a bit of a downer on my side because it dis-motivated me. So decided to leave it a side and dedicate myself to one thing at a time, like I posted last week.
From all the people I met only one seemed interested on this whole networking idea and we've kept in contact ever since.
My mum is a very sociable person and met this cafe owner down the street, who had recently repainted his business and was working with an animator who designed all the wallpaper for him. She commented this to me and also told me that he was looking for an experienced barista but could only pay 10 bucks an hour, cash in hand...so with all my enthusiasm for hospitality, I offered myself, coz lets face it, being a student isnt the most profitable thing...
So met up with this guy at his coffee shop and offered me to come in and try out some barista skills. Came back two days later, and there was this animator of chinese background, but the owner wasnt there, so began chatting and we got along suprisingly well. She showed me a childrens project she has been working on and was looking for a partner to team up and continue it in Australia, I was speakless, it was great and motivated me to offer my assistence and collaboration (after all that was exactly what I wanted to do with my personal networking project, to network and collaborate).
We met up once more today and had a great chat over coffee, and decided to team up. She has her own studio in china and is getting some funding to kick start her business and this also triggered interest in me because she IS moving.
Got back home refreshed with new ideas and thinking that all the stuff I have been doing for the past years, looking for opportunities and working hard for it is paying off....now I am pumped up at the moment, so will have to see where this is going to go, but it did have an incredible postitive impact on me and something to look forward to.
The more you search for opportunities the more they will come closer to you.
A good friend of mine told me the other day that each artist has his own pace and time. I get frustrated looking at younger artists that have gain a hell of a lot more experience than me or have a great opportunity because they happen to know someone, but after what has been happening, I think there is a bigger plan for me than "knowing someone".
Every thing has been linked this week.
I am stressed out about my new animation which is due in november, but just how we agreed with Jenifer today; Hard Work Pays Off...
I have always thought that one day I will be recognized by my peers as a great artist, I think that that is all artists dream. But i believe to get it you have to work for it. I have been pushing myself in various ways in these past 3 years, constantly locking myself up or getting frustrated when I see someone who has achieved something that I have been working for before me; which I believe to be part of growing as a person and professionally.
My trip back to Australia has helped my overcome a lot of things and one of these is to not depend on anyone when it is a personal decision, something I used to do a lot in Chile.
I have had some amazing experiences that have reminded me that my path towards animation or film is the way to go, but just have to get it right. I get frustrated by others that try and try but can't get it right and when you are willing to give them a hand they reject it. I'd like someone with more experienced than me to come along and give me a hand to understand this tough industry. But nothing is free in this life.
So i decided a few months ago, ( after trying in the past contacting numerous studios around Melbourne for an opportunity, which I never got because of all the competition) to set myself up as a freelancer. Seems easy when ou think about it, but I suppose its like marriage, you propose but then have to deal with all the preparations for that very day, which can be a headache (don't think its a good analogy but works for me.) So I said one day "fuck this I'll freelance", had no idea what to do or how to do it so I just dove into the pool, got my ABN number, then I got a whole bunch of things in the mail about tax which by the way freaked me out and never got down to reading it (i should shouldn't I?). I have been freaking out about the tax evasion thing since I have been doing some odd jobs here and there, should talk to my accountant. Did find a good resourse which I should follow step by step: http://www.australianinfront.com.au/talk/article/freelancing-in-melbourne
I like having my time at home, I can program myself to do what ever I want and whenever I want and I want to keep it that way, I have tryed to get back into the hospitality world because I need the money but really, it is the worst industry of all and dont have the time to deal with hypocrite and sarcastic chefs and customers, there is nothing of hospitality in the industry. I hear and read a lot of people saying they need a job on the side to be able (serving tables) to get through the way, but for its a distraction and a waste of my precious time to find what really matters. Money comes and goes, like a wise man said "make money work for you, don't work for money"
I tend to think outside of current projects and try to overload myself with things I cant even concentrate at the moment, and because I am a perfectionist by nature I get frustrated and therefore everyone does around me. I sit a look at all the talented people from diferents studios, making of and documentaries that inspire me and I end up saying "I want to do this instead" or "Im probably better at this other thing". So stick to one thing until you get it right. and that for now is animation. One thing will take to another.
So that is that, I enjoy my freedom, even though I have to be broke. But I know for sure that one day I'll hit the nail, and that is what I have to work for now, concentrate on one thing at a time.
Evolution By Edward Rocha, was the first ever published comic strip that I drew up when I was 16 years old that was published in the weekly newspaper "El Espejo de Casablanca" in 2002. Casablanca is the name of a small and very isolated town (even though they think its a city) located in central Chile, 30 minutes from Valparaiso and 1hr from Santiago the capital city.
Up till that time I always thought that drawing was more or less a hobby that I had picked up from my father, who was and is a successful cartoonist to whom I have looked up to my whole life. I was always the likes of physics and biology, which by the way I have always been intrigued by and fascinated, but found myself drawing through every single text book and only noticed what I had done when a teacher pointed it out to me at the age of 13, "you speak through your drawings" she said.
It was fun to draw all my class mates throughout primary school, I had an ongoing comic book that featured nearly every kid and teacher at school, also remind you that in Chile pretty much everyone had a nickname, like "big nose", "Egg", "horse or even really stupid and random ones like "torrejas" or "Chu lu pe pa"... yeah no sense at all. But all this influenced and sparked my imagination.
Thing is I never had a nickname, so my job was to make everybody elses nickname worthwhile.
I wasn't very popular and spent a lot of time by my own, drawing and crying because I had no friends...which was very common at the time for me, but grew to love my solitude.
It was cool to have a nickname and all cool guys (I thought) had one, so when I drew the first bunch of cartoons I had to create a character for myself which was an alien, not only because I loved the UFO subject (come on, every geek love it at some point of his life) but because I really didn't fit in with anyone. I used to draw this comic on old notebooks that had been left behind from previous school years or some that my 3 younger brothers never used; and probably filled around 4 books of drawings, all with unique characters but always ripping off the ever great Dragon Ball Z.
Years went by and the shy little chubby boy who sat in the corner and drew was no more, got into all the typical things that a teenage boy could get into…I began worrying about my body, my looks, girls, the group of people I wanted to hang out with, etc…but drawing and writing was always there in the background, but not as visible to others as it used to be and filled sketchbooks with doodles in my spare time. And so I spent more time looking down my pants than actually looking towards improving on my drawing skills.
At the start of the year 2000 (after every lunatic out there thought it was the end of the world) I was due to leave for Australia, back to where I was born, Melbourne, and try something different. Even though very young I thought it was the right decision but also I felt that I had to leave. I have always liked the idea of leaving and coming back, kinda like a journey of success, as if you’re an explorer that goes into the amazons and months later comes back empty handed but filled with knowledge about the strange world of the amazons kinda thing… it was a small town, so really…had to leave.
Before I ventured down under I left an A3 paper with all the characters I ever made and left it to the school which I got back years later and lost it… should’ve left it to the school.
So I left…
In Australia and as I attended school I repeated the same drawing and writing hobby I had in Chile, just to fit in and have a group who I could share it with. That year I wrote and drew the longest comic book I have ever done, a 450 pages with an open ending hard cover book, made out of left over paper and recycled paper from my class mates, who urged me to continue with the story. At times I’d even draw a whole bunch of pages and leave everyone wondering what was going to happen next with the main characters. The book might have travelled around my friends several times and included most of them in it with super powers and unique story lines, or even a brief appearance, anything that would get some popularity out there. It was quite successful.
I could say that my first ever interest in Animation came during this time, when I was to do my work experience. I rang up most of the animation studios in Melbourne, but none ever took me for some experience, you never know what would’ve happened if I ever got the opportunity…so I did it at Coles.
When I was alone and depressed about not having my brothers and parents I would draw photographic pictures of the view from my window in Chile, or sunsets that I could remember, and lost myself in thoughts.
After I finished this book I travelled back to Chile, not for holidays but to live, I had 16 and was home sick. By this time my drawing went back down again and began writing, I had an idea I had to put down on paper, so I did.
During high school in Chile I printed my first book called Evolution Part 1, an epic story about dragons and humans; with my inspiration coming from The Lord of the Rings books. I felt accomplished.
I had a sudden urge to keep writing and then again back into drawing the book and turning it into a comic strip.At the time I had discovered rock music and had been playing in a bands and been writing songs and ideas for very crazy concepts.
I got the idea to speak to my uncle who ran the weekly newspaper “El Espejo de Casablanca” (the Mirror of Casablanca) and publish a 2 part comic strip of the book. Did it for about 2 months, nobody read it, nobody understood it, but hey, was the first time I ever got published.
Later on down the track I got into music, had a band and here for the first time animation struck me; had an idea for a short video clip featuring an animation I would make.
This was a test I did for that very clip, which I did on paper. Didnt have a lightbox so had to use the window.
Some of my first animations.
I had always been blown away by Walt Disney and Pixar and how they would come up with such pieces of art, so when I commented it to my parents they were very supportive about the platform.In year 11, I was making up my mind on what I wanted to do after I had left school, it wasn’t an easy choice really regardless for my passion for drawing. I had considered Music or sound engineer, but my father at the time knew a teacher from the University of Playa Ancha who was doing a side course on animation, so he introduced me to him and attended to one of the sessions and It felt great to be in a university classroom and be part of something other than maths. But I only attended once… What had really put me off was a screening that I had gone to with my father, that really did not impress me at all. We kept browsing around and visited a few schools in Santiago that had animation, but the thing was that it was too expensive at the time and really did not know if I’d ever travel every morning from the small town of Casablanca to Santiago.
Some time after all the school visiting endeavour, I cant remember how, but we met an emerging animator in Chile that was really stirring things up in the capital with his confronting style. I can’t recall his name or the animation he had made, but when we went to visit him to his apartment I was blown away, he had made 20,000 frames for a cartoon he was producing and only being helped by one more animator. He invited me to come to his place and work with him and help him out…but I never did, here is one of the things I’d regret the rest of my life. He later appeared on television talking about his cartoon.
After browsing through lots of universities I came upon Graphic Design, which I entered only because of the little animation they taught. I sent 3 ½ years studying Graphic design at University of Viña del Mar, I later lost all motivation towards the career and felt that I was wasting my time and not doing what I really wanted to do, Animation. So I quit University and took some time off to think what I was going to do. I originally was going to swap from one University to another that had the same course but had more animation, but then decided to head back to Australia.
Teachers from my graphic design course wanted me to stay and persue a career with them because they thought I had potential, but really never liked it. I do recommend to anyone who wants to get into animation, to learn all the basics of design because it just broadens your creativity and loosens up ideas and concepts. If it wasn’t because of my 3 year Graphic design study I wouldn’t know much about composition, harmony between shapes or concept development.
Just before I left I was asked to do an animation for an Acordeon festival in Casablanca that was screened for 2 nights at a theatre, I felt proud and even more anxious of following my dream.
I travelled back to Australia, with the only objective to get into an animation course. Got myself a job and built up my confidence and of course got back into the language. In 2008 I sent numerous applications for RMIT and DEAKIN, but was rejected for some reason, which let me down big time, but did get into Holmesglen Institute of TAFE, where they had turned a Diploma of animation into a Degree so it was a 3 year Bachelor.
The best advice I can give to someone who wants to get into an animation course is to browse around first and investigate what are the best options out there before deciding on anything, because you can loose more than money at a place where there really isn’t a solid ground on the area. Don’t speak to people at open days, go and speak to the students and let them tell you how the course is, because obviously every university wants you there.
But regardless of my decision, it was the only place that called me up and gave me the opportunity, and really if it wasn’t for these past 3 years at this place I wouldn’t have grown to know what I really wanted to do with my career.
I believe the more you ask for things the more they have a way of finding you, I had been looking for opportunities my whole life and a few showed up and really had massive impacts on my decisions.
Well here I am 3 years later, on my last year of my animation course, it’s been more of a solo ride for my knowledge regarding that really there was no solid ground in this course ever since I started, so I had to go back to my books and practice on the side.
I can also say that if it wasn’t for some teachers and talented classmates I wouldn’t have learnt much from the degree as it’s been designed.Well anyway, you have to learn to overcome some things so you can conquer others.
I have had this idea of blogging for a while now but never got down to it, till I finally decided I had to, so in the future I could look back at my steps and maybe learn a little something from my errors and success. The idea is to post an entry every week and keep updating it until I reach my goal, which for now is to be recognized a successful artist, it could be as an animator, as a concept artist, who knows, but hey that’s the fun about it. To never know what’s around the corner, but still work hard…
